MORE: Don’t Believe This Major Myth About Orgasms If you and your partner want to use something like the Scarleteen checklist as your foreplay/clothes-on section, then why not consider adding in a section that describes specific sexual acts, toys and other items for when you two are intimate with one another. Notable points to consider adding to your checklist might include: “A partner touching me affectionately without asking first,” “Being looked at directly, overall, when I am naked” or “Touching a partner sexually without asking first.” There’s no confusion here about what each act requires, and the Scarleteen checklist also acts as a great suggestion for formulating the first phase of your consent checklist.īonus: Your checklist can be divvied up into phases or stages. Take one look through the one devised by Scarleteen and you’ll see that different kinds of sexual acts are clearly described so as not to lead to confusion. The checklist should be as thorough as possible. Luckily, you’re not totally at sea when it comes to creating a checklist there are already plenty of checklists out there in the world you and your partner can work off into order to create one tailor-made for you both. MORE: Would You Be Happier if You Were in an Open Relationship? Do You and Your S.O. Plus, you don’t want to negatively impact your partner or your relationship by surprising them with something unexpected when they are at their most vulnerable. Establishing those limits and opening those doors to new, exciting adventures to have with your partner will make every enthusiastic yes even better. This stage is also the time to put on the table what you like to do and what you don’t like to do and what you absolutely do not want to do when you have sex. Now, you don’t have to go through the exact play-by-play, but just establishing that you two are both down for having sex, just engaging in a little bit of foreplay or maybe mixing it up by adding in something new is something that should be talked about.

The talk we’re talking about it is sitting down with your partner (preferably with your clothes on) before any kind of foreplay or touching has gotten into the mix and talking about what you two expect to do together. No, this isn’t about the birds and the bees. She has published four books: Love, Sex and Everything In-Between, Orgasmic Yoga, From Princess to Queen and Inhibited.And so, with that in mind, let’s take a look at the benefits of creating a yes/no/maybe list with your partner to make sure you’re both safe and satisfied when you’re engaging in any kind of sexual activity. She was recognised as one of ‘Top 50 Inspiring Women Under 40′ by Her World in July 2010, and one of ‘Top 100 Inspiring Women’ by Coz圜ot in March 2011. Lee is the appointed Clinical Sexologist for Singapore Cancer Society. In practice since 2009, she is the only certified sexuality educator and certified sexuality educator supervisor by the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) in Singapore.

She also holds certificates in counselling, coaching and sex therapy, and her fourth degree – a Masters in Counselling in May 2018. Today, she remains dedicated to working with individuals and couples who wish to lead self-actualised and pleasure-filled lives. Martha Tara Lee set out to make a positive difference in embarking on her doctorate in human sexuality before launching Eros Coaching in 2009. Surrounded by friends who were sexually inhibited and struck by dire lack of positive conversations around sex and sexuality in Singapore, Dr.

Kinks checklist yes no maybe list